Sunday, April 20, 2008

journey, part 3


The first area of change had to be outward appearance. How you see yourself greatly affects how you feel. Looking in the mirror, I looked like I was hiding myself among the baggy, over-sized clothes. After discussing my concerns with a friend/co-worker, we decided to immediately go shopping before I changed my mind, another friend came along. So over an extended lunch break, the three of us had a What Not To Wear shopping session at the mall. I made a vow to myself that I would not make another purchase of clothing that would hide me. Also, as I replaced them I gave away all the old clothing so I would not slip back into them and the accompanying mood.

The next phase was to find something to do for myself. The opportunity arose in the fall of 2006. A co-worker had sent out a notice that Adult Women's soccer league was developing and they were looking for players. Outside of PE in school and walking for exercise, I had never participated in any sport. I was always involved in academics. As a celebration of my 37th birthday, that day I participated in my first soccer pick up game. In the second half of that first game, I played the goalie position and stayed there every since. There was no way I was going to run around with the other women who were 10-15 years younger and in better physical condition. Even though I did not lose any weight I thought I would, I did get stronger and "earned" the nickname "brick wall". There were some that actually bounced off of me on collisions and I barely felt anything. There were two impacts that I recall best. One was when many teammates kept asking if I was okay after an impact. I repeated answered I was fine. Finally I asked, "what was the big deal, why is everyone keep asking me that?". A teammate answered, "because you were hit by two people at the same time." I knew I was hit hard but not by two. The other incident actually took me out of the game. I was hit while airborne; twisted my leg in the hip area and ended up on the ground, a rare situation. I think I took a week's break and back to the field it was. I have not played since last July; two family reunions filled the rest of the month and my son started 1st grade at a new school the following month. He had issues, so I did not have time for soccer.

During the same time I was playing soccer, I started something based on a thought out of the blue. Since my childhood days, I would always daydream, home, school, wherever. I got into plenty of trouble by not paying attention. I gained better control over it as I grew older but it was still there. I would take a situation I saw/heard/dreamt and asked "what if...". So one morning while thinking about something I had dreamed, I decided to write it down. What started as a small thought developed into a novel nine months later. I am in the process of preparing it to be published. I became a writer. A few months ago, I met someone who has encouraged me to write more. Since then I have started writing verse. I never thought that I would be a writer; they seemed to be so artistic and out of my league. And now I am one. I have started on another story that may be novel length also. I will just see how it turns out.

Thankfully, a few months ago hubby heard about T-ball registration at a park in the area. My son wanted to participate so I signed him up. Since he lives like an only child, his half-sister is going to college in another state, he needed to learn how to share, work with others, and follow rules better. Plus he would be around more male figures. I do not want him to grow up to be a momma's boy. His school life seems to be better since he started playing and he is learning a lot. He mostly plays third base. He does need more self-control and accuracy, but he is trying. Watching Major League Baseball has helped also.

In addition to the two game days and one team practice a week, I try to take him to the park for practice or we just practice in the yard. Usually I help out in coaching, just reiterating what the coach has demonstrated during practice, and last week I was the third base coach for a game when the regular guy could not make it. So at least I am participating in a sport again and spending quality time with my son.

Next, change in living arrangements


  1. the girl across the wayApril 21, 2008 at 9:56 AM

    Journeys are such an important part of life...and you know I've been on two incredible ones! One with my health and the other with the love of my life. And I'm looking forward to many more.

  2. @the girl...:you know you are always in my prayers and hold on to that guy of yours. You know, according to DC, he is imaginary until he makes an appearance. lol

    @torrance: Maybe. I just need to pay attention to the other kids when my son is at bat. After he hit, the kids were running and I forgot about them. Ooops!

  3. Brick wall -- three more sides and what do you get -- a brick house!

    good read, I need to catch up and read parts 1 and 2

  4. @rich: brick house? lol
    I am a long way from that!


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