And then there were 3 (post #100)

It's coincidental that the topic of my 100th post relates to one written almost 50 posts ago, the arrival of my niece for temporary residence into our home.

Although, not all goals were achieved, there were many accomplishments in areas of personal growth and confidence, diet and exercise, and chore routines. We desired more effectiveness in her academics, but it is difficult or just mere impossible to help someone that rarely allows you to assist. Perhaps with more time and different academic environment, the results would have been different. As a slight consolation we had to remember, not all could have been expected in a mere seven months.

Last Friday was the last day of her school term and she moved back home. We pray that any positive experiences she had in our home, she will remember and incorporate them in her journey to be a successful young woman.

To my surprise, my son has not expressed much sadness for her departure, being that she was like a sibling to him. He had grown more than I thought.

We miss you already, De-De.

Aunt Ne-Ne

A New Journey

As many do this day, I reflect upon what I have accomplished this past year, note the tasks that were left incomplete, and set goals for the upcoming year.

I've decided to take New Year's Resolutions much further than I have done in the past. I've verbalized them; I've written them on a list. Now that I love blogging, I've started a new blog, A Plan In Action, to document and track my personal goals. The goals are not just for 2009, as I know all will not be attainable in one year, but a place so share my desires and aspirations.

You are welcome to join me. I look forward to your comments, concerns and suggestions.

Thanks for stopping by to visit. You have always been welcome.

Happy New Year! 2009

journey, part 3

Changes.

The first area of change had to be outward appearance. How you see yourself greatly affects how you feel. Looking in the mirror, I looked like I was hiding myself among the baggy, over-sized clothes. After discussing my concerns with a friend/co-worker, we decided to immediately go shopping before I changed my mind, another friend came along. So over an extended lunch break, the three of us had a What Not To Wear shopping session at the mall. I made a vow to myself that I would not make another purchase of clothing that would hide me. Also, as I replaced them I gave away all the old clothing so I would not slip back into them and the accompanying mood.


The next phase was to find something to do for myself. The opportunity arose in the fall of 2006. A co-worker had sent out a notice that Adult Women's soccer league was developing and they were looking for players. Outside of PE in school and walking for exercise, I had never participated in any sport. I was always involved in academics. As a celebration of my 37th birthday, that day I participated in my first soccer pick up game. In the second half of that first game, I played the goalie position and stayed there every since. There was no way I was going to run around with the other women who were 10-15 years younger and in better physical condition. Even though I did not lose any weight I thought I would, I did get stronger and "earned" the nickname "brick wall". There were some that actually bounced off of me on collisions and I barely felt anything. There were two impacts that I recall best. One was when many teammates kept asking if I was okay after an impact. I repeated answered I was fine. Finally I asked, "what was the big deal, why is everyone keep asking me that?". A teammate answered, "because you were hit by two people at the same time." I knew I was hit hard but not by two. The other incident actually took me out of the game. I was hit while airborne; twisted my leg in the hip area and ended up on the ground, a rare situation. I think I took a week's break and back to the field it was. I have not played since last July; two family reunions filled the rest of the month and my son started 1st grade at a new school the following month. He had issues, so I did not have time for soccer.


During the same time I was playing soccer, I started something based on a thought out of the blue. Since my childhood days, I would always daydream, home, school, wherever. I got into plenty of trouble by not paying attention. I gained better control over it as I grew older but it was still there. I would take a situation I saw/heard/dreamt and asked "what if...". So one morning while thinking about something I had dreamed, I decided to write it down. What started as a small thought developed into a novel nine months later. I am in the process of preparing it to be published. I became a writer. A few months ago, I met someone who has encouraged me to write more. Since then I have started writing verse. I never thought that I would be a writer; they seemed to be so artistic and out of my league. And now I am one. I have started on another story that may be novel length also. I will just see how it turns out.


Thankfully, a few months ago hubby heard about T-ball registration at a park in the area. My son wanted to participate so I signed him up. Since he lives like an only child, his half-sister is going to college in another state, he needed to learn how to share, work with others, and follow rules better. Plus he would be around more male figures. I do not want him to grow up to be a momma's boy. His school life seems to be better since he started playing and he is learning a lot. He mostly plays third base. He does need more self-control and accuracy, but he is trying. Watching Major League Baseball has helped also.

In addition to the two game days and one team practice a week, I try to take him to the park for practice or we just practice in the yard. Usually I help out in coaching, just reiterating what the coach has demonstrated during practice, and last week I was the third base coach for a game when the regular guy could not make it. So at least I am participating in a sport again and spending quality time with my son.

Next, change in living arrangements

journey, part 2

Now we were both out of work with an infant, mortgage, and two car notes. He was able to find work here and there in his field but it wasn't enough to cover everything and he had to travel.
As expected, assets dwindled and the house was put on the market. Mom offered her home to us so my job search expanded to my home town. Finding no job postings in my field, as expected, I had to find a job a tedious way. I searched the Yellow Pages online for ads that contained web addresses for IT companies in the area. I had found a few that were promising. On a Monday, ten days after sending my cover letter and resume to their HR department, I received a phone call from the president of the company. An interview was set for the Friday of the same week. Knowing I would be in town, a family friend tried to make arrangements for me to get an interview at her job on the same day. It wasn't necessary, I was offered a position before the interview ended. Of course I accepted.

So there I was, employed again, but at less than half of my previous income, and separted from Hubby during the week. Hubby's work ended and he had trouble finding a new one; and there was still the mortgage, car notes, utilities, etc. for the home in the ATL. I commuted weekly until the house was sold 10 months later on a Friday. Hubby started truck driving school the following Tuesday and was gone for three weeks. After completing the course and a few weeks searching transportation companies, he became an official long haul driver, coming home every two or three weekends; another form of separation.

The financial recovery process began to clear the mounds of debt; including payback to family that assisted during that crucial year. It took several years but it was done around the time I started my personal evaluation in 2006.

... jumping back to future...

journey, part 1

I feel I need to get this out as to continue on my journey.

Early 2006, I visited my family physician for a regular checkup. As normal, a routine bloodwork was ordered. The results showed that my iron level was too low, so doc prescribed an iron/vitamin supplement to raise the level.

Within the first few days of taking the pills, I realized how much of a slump I had been in. My energy level seemed to shoot through the roof. I began to analyze myself and quickly determined that I did not like what I found internally and on the surface. I was a perfect candidate for What Not To Wear, Dr. Phil or The Oprah Show, even though I am not a fan Phil or Oprah. Basically my days were spent on working, and taking care of hubby, son, mother, sister, niece, and whoever needed whatever. I was not taking care of myself.

During further evaluation of my life, I remembered hubby saying that I had changed since my son was born in the summer of 2001. During my pregnancy, I had to take iron supplements, but after his birth I gradually stopped taking them. I believe that was when my downward spiral began coupled with the loss of work. I was contracting at the time and had planned to start a new contract when my son was 2 months old. Unfortunately when he was 6 1/2 weeks old, the 9/11 attacks occurred and the bottom fell out of the IT industry in the ATL area. That contract was cancelled and it seemed that there were no contracts for perm jobs to be found. So there I was with an infant and no job.

I spent my days taking care of the house, the baby and the rest of every waking moment in the job search. It did not seem too bad at first, just tiring. We thought that within 6 months things would be better. We were wrong. The following January, hubby was laid off.